There was no space..
I was still standing looking at all the memories which heart was reading
I felt like I should hold him and console...
Those were the moments which were written for you, no more, no less.
But he couldn’t let it go...
He was running in all those memory lines, trying to hold back each moment again
I couldn't bid adieu to him right away
I was lingering at the corner of an eye... but when he broke his limits and couldn't hold him anymore, I felt so that is it!!
I couldn’t see that more and thought I should give him some space
And I left him alone...
Could still feel that warmth and just said one thing...
“I will be forever with you…” take care
Thursday, 14 October 2010
Tuesday, 31 August 2010
Vayam
People sounds too “Nirjiv”, it’s about souls around me. There is a dedicated “vertical” in literature which handles these types of write-ups. God has created every individual unique; there can’t be 2 identical persons. So when you were going to school, college or while you are working; you meet so many interesting, lovable, cute, intelligent, arrogant, selfish, dull, dumb, happy-go-lucky, aloof, (the list is endless…) people. Each one of us can come up with a book on them J
There is set of people, who live in their cocoon, if you are able to break that or barge into it, you would discover so many beautiful interesting things about them that you would curse their habit of keeping themselves “shielded”.
Then there is another category called as “Jagan-Mitra”, these folks just enter into your life as your childhood, youth make their path. You don’t even realize when you met for the first time and when it turned into “a true friendship”.
Then there are certain people, who will be “happy-go-lucky”. I call them angels or “gandharv”. When they are around you forget everything, their company is so much fulfilling that they spread happiness around their “sphere of influence”. These are really God’s children, who are far far away from all the treachery, deceit, jealousy or some kind of bad vibes. You just want to enjoy their company. They do not categories for friends, they think in the same way for a person whom they met in the bus just an hour back or a friend from childhood.
Didn’t I mention just so called “good” people around us, where are the “bad” sets? Actually they don’t exist, they are just the perception. What the F***? You don’t live in ideal world, you don’t live in “Satya-Yug”… there is this set very much in existence. Okay okay, I agree, but have you ever thought that you might be in the same set for someone? Have you ever thought that, what would be feeling of a “Killer” for his own son? Does that mean that “Killer” would be bad for his son as well? Or let’s put it in other way, “Is that Killer’s son is able to understand the bigger picture?”
Why are we even thinking about this… the reason I am mentioning is because it’s all about perception, situation and our view-point. Our point-of-view changes about situations, people when any of the above mentioned 3 things’ orientation changes. The Good, The Bad, play their role as it has been written, many times scripted because of our deeds of previous birth or our current deeds. If we apply physics, mathematics or any modern science, we can very well understand this. How come sins committed by me will go without any account balance? This is something which should be left for individual’s “chintan-manan”…
Whatever I wrote till now was kind of monologue. When I was portraying some characters, I felt like “who am I to typecast someone?” Then the answer comes as you are “You” who should try and understand the complicated equation of differentiation where limit is tending to ∞ (both + and -) and we trying to deduce our “I” and then integration again ranging from +∞ to -∞ of all our deeds and finally get the value of 0 which is
“Om, Purn mad:, Purnam midam,
purnat purn mudacchate.
Purnasya purn maday,
purna mewawshishyate”.
There is set of people, who live in their cocoon, if you are able to break that or barge into it, you would discover so many beautiful interesting things about them that you would curse their habit of keeping themselves “shielded”.
Then there is another category called as “Jagan-Mitra”, these folks just enter into your life as your childhood, youth make their path. You don’t even realize when you met for the first time and when it turned into “a true friendship”.
Then there are certain people, who will be “happy-go-lucky”. I call them angels or “gandharv”. When they are around you forget everything, their company is so much fulfilling that they spread happiness around their “sphere of influence”. These are really God’s children, who are far far away from all the treachery, deceit, jealousy or some kind of bad vibes. You just want to enjoy their company. They do not categories for friends, they think in the same way for a person whom they met in the bus just an hour back or a friend from childhood.
Didn’t I mention just so called “good” people around us, where are the “bad” sets? Actually they don’t exist, they are just the perception. What the F***? You don’t live in ideal world, you don’t live in “Satya-Yug”… there is this set very much in existence. Okay okay, I agree, but have you ever thought that you might be in the same set for someone? Have you ever thought that, what would be feeling of a “Killer” for his own son? Does that mean that “Killer” would be bad for his son as well? Or let’s put it in other way, “Is that Killer’s son is able to understand the bigger picture?”
Why are we even thinking about this… the reason I am mentioning is because it’s all about perception, situation and our view-point. Our point-of-view changes about situations, people when any of the above mentioned 3 things’ orientation changes. The Good, The Bad, play their role as it has been written, many times scripted because of our deeds of previous birth or our current deeds. If we apply physics, mathematics or any modern science, we can very well understand this. How come sins committed by me will go without any account balance? This is something which should be left for individual’s “chintan-manan”…
Whatever I wrote till now was kind of monologue. When I was portraying some characters, I felt like “who am I to typecast someone?” Then the answer comes as you are “You” who should try and understand the complicated equation of differentiation where limit is tending to ∞ (both + and -) and we trying to deduce our “I” and then integration again ranging from +∞ to -∞ of all our deeds and finally get the value of 0 which is
“Om, Purn mad:, Purnam midam,
purnat purn mudacchate.
Purnasya purn maday,
purna mewawshishyate”.
Tuesday, 24 August 2010
ते वादळ...
ते वादळ आलं ती बहुदा मुळे आणखिन घट्ट करायला
तुमच्य़ा आत्म्याला हलवुन दाखवुन द्यायला तुमची शक्ति
आणि मग त्या थ्योड्या मोकळ्या झालेल्या मातीमधे परत घट्ट रुजवायची मुळे झाडाने
उगाचच वादळाला दोष दिला तेंव्हा
त्याने तर मदतच केली होती आपल्याला, अधिक द्रुढ बनायला
सारं आकाश, जमीन आणि अंत:करण यातल्या कचरयाचा निचरा करायला
मग तोच उडालेला कचरा गोल गोल फ़िरून दमला आणि शांतपणे दूर जाउन बसला
आता सारं काहि स्वच्छ झालय… परत एकदा वळवाचा पाऊस पडणार आहे
त्या पहिल्या म्रुदगंधामधे मोर नाचणार आहे… मंत्रमुग्ध होऊन…
तुमच्य़ा आत्म्याला हलवुन दाखवुन द्यायला तुमची शक्ति
आणि मग त्या थ्योड्या मोकळ्या झालेल्या मातीमधे परत घट्ट रुजवायची मुळे झाडाने
उगाचच वादळाला दोष दिला तेंव्हा
त्याने तर मदतच केली होती आपल्याला, अधिक द्रुढ बनायला
सारं आकाश, जमीन आणि अंत:करण यातल्या कचरयाचा निचरा करायला
मग तोच उडालेला कचरा गोल गोल फ़िरून दमला आणि शांतपणे दूर जाउन बसला
आता सारं काहि स्वच्छ झालय… परत एकदा वळवाचा पाऊस पडणार आहे
त्या पहिल्या म्रुदगंधामधे मोर नाचणार आहे… मंत्रमुग्ध होऊन…
That was drive without reason
It was a normal evening, I thought of going somewhere or probably nowhere. I started from my home thinking about a place where there will at least “some amount” of peace, where I can look at sky without listening to horns from bikes or cars, where I can smell the fresh air, where I can hear to the different voices of birds, where I can hear whispering leaves… I stopped at different signals; I was watching people on bikes, in cars, walking on the road, few houses which were adjacent to roads.
I could see everyone running behind something or running with the clock. Everyone had sense of urgency to reach to some hotel, to meet friends, family or to attend informal/formal meeting to continue the business decisions.
There were so many houses which were not flats or apartments. I could see people waiting for something, either they were looking for Auto-Rickshaws or someone was going to pick them up. Some of them were parents in their late 50s or early 60s; I guess they were looking for someone who would care for them. There were girls and boys who were waiting for their “love” or their friends with whom they were planning the dinner. There were friends of all ages completely submerged into their "circle of concern" happily chatting and laughing. There were kids playing on the road, in houses or in schools who were totally free of any tensions, their game was so important that everyone was playing to win.
I reached a place which I thought would be the ideal place where I can see Pune city in its entirety. I parked my bike and started going towards the hill, to my surprise there were herds of people who were going up and down. Probably my guess was wrong for the place where I can find the serenity of nature.
By the way why was I looking for something rather what was I looking for? Was it just me? Why do I have time to think about all this? Is it lack of friends? Is it lack of planned outings? Or is it something bigger than that lack of Goal? I remember some statement which says “It is easy to die for something but it is really worth living entire life for something” – “śalabha bana jalanā sarala hai, prema kī jalatī śikhā par | svayaṁ ko til-til jalā kar, dīpa bananā hī kaṭhin hai”
The effect of Inception hasn’t gone yet so I tend to relate some things to that movie, we are happy when we Live in some inception, we are happy when we know that we are not in any inception and living what we want to… probably some would call that as “self-orchestrated” inception.. but it is killing when we know that – I am seeing myself in inception and I don’t want to get kick or I am waiting for outside kick instead of self architecting.
We can write, talk about life in thousands and thousands of words… We can have our own philosophies and fundas about “How to live life”… we can have our simple rules of enjoying life. And all those rules, experiences, fundas are worth to read or hear it coz at the end of the day it is that individual’s view of Life… it is his or her dream… it is his or her experience… it is the journey towards their goal… it is love, it is passion, it is devotion, it is “samarpan”
Hats off to all who have realized their reason of existence and lived or living their life for that very reason!!!
All the best to all who are on the quest of finding the reason!!!
..........And for rest I guess we need to realize to start that quest
I could see everyone running behind something or running with the clock. Everyone had sense of urgency to reach to some hotel, to meet friends, family or to attend informal/formal meeting to continue the business decisions.
There were so many houses which were not flats or apartments. I could see people waiting for something, either they were looking for Auto-Rickshaws or someone was going to pick them up. Some of them were parents in their late 50s or early 60s; I guess they were looking for someone who would care for them. There were girls and boys who were waiting for their “love” or their friends with whom they were planning the dinner. There were friends of all ages completely submerged into their "circle of concern" happily chatting and laughing. There were kids playing on the road, in houses or in schools who were totally free of any tensions, their game was so important that everyone was playing to win.
I reached a place which I thought would be the ideal place where I can see Pune city in its entirety. I parked my bike and started going towards the hill, to my surprise there were herds of people who were going up and down. Probably my guess was wrong for the place where I can find the serenity of nature.
By the way why was I looking for something rather what was I looking for? Was it just me? Why do I have time to think about all this? Is it lack of friends? Is it lack of planned outings? Or is it something bigger than that lack of Goal? I remember some statement which says “It is easy to die for something but it is really worth living entire life for something” – “śalabha bana jalanā sarala hai, prema kī jalatī śikhā par | svayaṁ ko til-til jalā kar, dīpa bananā hī kaṭhin hai”
The effect of Inception hasn’t gone yet so I tend to relate some things to that movie, we are happy when we Live in some inception, we are happy when we know that we are not in any inception and living what we want to… probably some would call that as “self-orchestrated” inception.. but it is killing when we know that – I am seeing myself in inception and I don’t want to get kick or I am waiting for outside kick instead of self architecting.
We can write, talk about life in thousands and thousands of words… We can have our own philosophies and fundas about “How to live life”… we can have our simple rules of enjoying life. And all those rules, experiences, fundas are worth to read or hear it coz at the end of the day it is that individual’s view of Life… it is his or her dream… it is his or her experience… it is the journey towards their goal… it is love, it is passion, it is devotion, it is “samarpan”
Hats off to all who have realized their reason of existence and lived or living their life for that very reason!!!
All the best to all who are on the quest of finding the reason!!!
..........And for rest I guess we need to realize to start that quest
Saturday, 3 April 2010
समर्पण
क्या सच है, क्या झुठ... क्या वर्तमान क्या भविष्य
जीने के हर प्रयास में करता हुं हर पल ये विचरण।
क्या विश्व है माया, या अपने भुत का भुगतान
हर समय चल रहा... ये विचारों का रण।
धरा से जुडा हुआ, आकाश कि चाह करता,
इस नश्वर शरीर का हर कण
शून्य से निकलकर, शून्य मे लिन हो,
जन्म लेतेही हर जीव ने किया ये समर्पण।
यत्न कर बन सके, हम भी शिष्य पार्थ से
जो दे सके ’भगवन’ हमे "विश्वरुप"दर्शन।
समझु मै "अस्तित्व" को, जानकर समाज-दर्पण
हो युगंधर कि साधना, उसके ही रुप में अर्पण॥
जीने के हर प्रयास में करता हुं हर पल ये विचरण।
क्या विश्व है माया, या अपने भुत का भुगतान
हर समय चल रहा... ये विचारों का रण।
धरा से जुडा हुआ, आकाश कि चाह करता,
इस नश्वर शरीर का हर कण
शून्य से निकलकर, शून्य मे लिन हो,
जन्म लेतेही हर जीव ने किया ये समर्पण।
यत्न कर बन सके, हम भी शिष्य पार्थ से
जो दे सके ’भगवन’ हमे "विश्वरुप"दर्शन।
समझु मै "अस्तित्व" को, जानकर समाज-दर्पण
हो युगंधर कि साधना, उसके ही रुप में अर्पण॥
Tuesday, 16 March 2010
SOAP, Narmada Parikrama and Life....
Does title makes sense to you? Just while watching Friends Joey says to Ross, "Did you check the trail?", Chandler shows him how the trail is important and by the time Ross tries to close the trail, it is all over...
Steven Levitt explains such "trails" in Freakonomics for Sumo pehalawans and many others....
Coming back to SOAP first. In last 8 months Symbian C++ has created always something or the other challenging situations. The ones which I absolutely couldn't forget are 1. Syncing up "Options" button with center button click 2. calculating checksum and now 3rd one in the list is SOAP request... in last 2 times I was kind of "freezed" with those issues. Now one more challenge SOAP, now what ?? There are people targeting you thinking that you are doing nothing but the time-pass and you have got such show-stopper...
Today I felt like crying because nothing was working, there was not a single code snippet explaining how to use that thing in Symbian... on top of it Carbide's internet connection didn't work after all sorts of trials. I felt like shouting, breaking the machine which was in front of me but thanks to "little sense" left with me I didn't any of it.... decided to come back home. Did I try creating code from scratch???? Nahh... I was looking for pointers...
I started driving the bike and suddenly "Narmada Parikrama" came into my mind. In "Narmade Har Har" Jagannathrao Kunte tells countlessssssssssssss examples where he was hurt, there were so many hurdles but then he kept on walking and "narmada maiyya" gave him surprises in terms of help, food and shelter.
That thought reiterated universal truth that no matter what you have to keep on walking, you might be hurt, tired, dejected but you should not stop. The answer to your questions is right there very close to you but you have to move towards it....
There are many thought processes which tells different things to understand "life", to realize our "goal". I think our daily routine is one of them.
Probably you are a Software Engineer or Doctor or Farmer or Carpenter or something else, life teaches you different lessons, it shows you path towards success, it makes you realize that once you drop yours "wants" and do "nishkam karma" you get what you are destined.
What is life? Is it about going abroad? Is it about owning a biig flat and a BMW? Is it about getting appreciated and when you die seeing from nowhere that there are herds coming for your funeral??? What is it?
Did you find the trail???
Steven Levitt explains such "trails" in Freakonomics for Sumo pehalawans and many others....
Coming back to SOAP first. In last 8 months Symbian C++ has created always something or the other challenging situations. The ones which I absolutely couldn't forget are 1. Syncing up "Options" button with center button click 2. calculating checksum and now 3rd one in the list is SOAP request... in last 2 times I was kind of "freezed" with those issues. Now one more challenge SOAP, now what ?? There are people targeting you thinking that you are doing nothing but the time-pass and you have got such show-stopper...
Today I felt like crying because nothing was working, there was not a single code snippet explaining how to use that thing in Symbian... on top of it Carbide's internet connection didn't work after all sorts of trials. I felt like shouting, breaking the machine which was in front of me but thanks to "little sense" left with me I didn't any of it.... decided to come back home. Did I try creating code from scratch???? Nahh... I was looking for pointers...
I started driving the bike and suddenly "Narmada Parikrama" came into my mind. In "Narmade Har Har" Jagannathrao Kunte tells countlessssssssssssss examples where he was hurt, there were so many hurdles but then he kept on walking and "narmada maiyya" gave him surprises in terms of help, food and shelter.
That thought reiterated universal truth that no matter what you have to keep on walking, you might be hurt, tired, dejected but you should not stop. The answer to your questions is right there very close to you but you have to move towards it....
There are many thought processes which tells different things to understand "life", to realize our "goal". I think our daily routine is one of them.
Probably you are a Software Engineer or Doctor or Farmer or Carpenter or something else, life teaches you different lessons, it shows you path towards success, it makes you realize that once you drop yours "wants" and do "nishkam karma" you get what you are destined.
What is life? Is it about going abroad? Is it about owning a biig flat and a BMW? Is it about getting appreciated and when you die seeing from nowhere that there are herds coming for your funeral??? What is it?
Did you find the trail???
Saturday, 16 January 2010
Time
It's been 6 months I am back in Bharat. Initially I was literally found things different... basically this time I had come back for good... I had experienced something which can not be explained and told, it has to be experienced .
Anyway after coming back I wanted to take part in everything.. i.e. Infosys Foundation, ITMilan, Sayamshakha, Office work i.e. learning new technologies, More responsibilities like CC, DP and whatnot, Help friends, Attending functions, Going places with friends, missed one more thing - going on Ruturang Apartment's committee (which I feel was really not required at that point :()... but all these things gave me a very good lesson, that you can not be part of everything. You have to focus on things on priority basis. You can definitely experience everything but not at a time.
This also explored a proven fact that I am really worst in terms of keeping house clean... I wanted to write my experience of last one year... couldn't do it yet :( and that's not because I am busy but because I am lazy.. that is because I did not manage time...
Finally while adding some videos on iPhone and iPod which Eshan was asking from a long time, I realized why not to write a quick blog post. It really doesn't take more than 30 mins to pen down I mean keyboard down your thoughts :)...
I am sure while writing this blog also I must have gone tangent from one place to another :)
Talking about office... the Vistaraking ("Vistarak" was added as a verb in dictionary in Feb 08 in Houston Yuva Varg :D) has changed my whole approach of working in office.
As told by many great ppl, "Expectations" are the main cause of all sorrows in the world... but that doesn't mean that you don't work, you don't strive for grades, you definitely do but without expecting that it's gonna happen :)
Also finding great qualities in each and every human being has helped in finding yourself always in good company.
I hope to keep the blog updated reagularly... not sure that, this will happen.
I might end up updating the blog after one year.. saying same things :D
for now... bbye
Anyway after coming back I wanted to take part in everything.. i.e. Infosys Foundation, ITMilan, Sayamshakha, Office work i.e. learning new technologies, More responsibilities like CC, DP and whatnot, Help friends, Attending functions, Going places with friends, missed one more thing - going on Ruturang Apartment's committee (which I feel was really not required at that point :()... but all these things gave me a very good lesson, that you can not be part of everything. You have to focus on things on priority basis. You can definitely experience everything but not at a time.
This also explored a proven fact that I am really worst in terms of keeping house clean... I wanted to write my experience of last one year... couldn't do it yet :( and that's not because I am busy but because I am lazy.. that is because I did not manage time...
Finally while adding some videos on iPhone and iPod which Eshan was asking from a long time, I realized why not to write a quick blog post. It really doesn't take more than 30 mins to pen down I mean keyboard down your thoughts :)...
I am sure while writing this blog also I must have gone tangent from one place to another :)
Talking about office... the Vistaraking ("Vistarak" was added as a verb in dictionary in Feb 08 in Houston Yuva Varg :D) has changed my whole approach of working in office.
As told by many great ppl, "Expectations" are the main cause of all sorrows in the world... but that doesn't mean that you don't work, you don't strive for grades, you definitely do but without expecting that it's gonna happen :)
Also finding great qualities in each and every human being has helped in finding yourself always in good company.
I hope to keep the blog updated reagularly... not sure that, this will happen.
I might end up updating the blog after one year.. saying same things :D
for now... bbye
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